Happy Holidays

MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM SANTA TROOPER

Not To Beat A Dead Horse...

The Lt. Commander went out to find that none of the Clone Troopers were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily.


LT. COMMANDER CHECKING OUT THE TROOPS

"Sorry, Lt. Commander! I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late. I ran to the Shuttle but missed it, I hailed a speeder but it broke down, found a farm, bought a Taun Taun but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I'm here."

The Lt. Commander was very skeptical about this explanation but at least the Clone Trooper was here so the Lt. Commander let him go.

Moments later, eight more Clone Troopers came up to the general panting; she asked them why they were late.

"Sorry, Lt. Commander! I had a date and it ran a little late, I ran to the Shuttle but missed it, I hailed a speeder but it broke down, found a farm, bought a Taun Taun but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I'm here."

The Lt. Commander eyed them, feeling very skeptical but since she let the first guy go, she let them go, too.

The TK 266 jogged up to the Lt. Commander, panting heavily. "Sorry, Lt. Commander! I had a date and it ran a little late, I ran to the Shuttle but missed it, I hailed a speeder but..."

"Let me guess," the Lt. Commander interrupted, "it broke down."

"No," said the Tak "there were so many dead Taun Taun in the road, it took forever to get around them."


EWWW, A DEAD TAUN TAUN!!!

Who Wants to be a Supervillain: Finale

Happening now on Who want to be a super villain. (we Have to make a doomsday devise and take over China)

“Not bad ideas. I think we will use both of them in conjunction with mine. I call it the Duel Death Star!!!!!” I say with my best booming voice.

Click here to read more

Little Green Wisdom

I had been assigned to General Yoda before large battle.


“WHY BOTHERING ME, ARE YOU TROOPER?”

He was meditating before thing got under way and he let out a long sigh.

“General Yoda, what do you thing of the coming battle? What did you meditation tell you?” I asked

“Hard to see the future is. But lost this battle will be.” Yoda says sagely

“If the battle lost, then why should we should we fight it?” I reply

Yoda looks at me and fires up his light saber. “To find out who is the loser!”


COME ON MOFO, GET SOME

Super-Villain: taking over evil

Happening Now on Who Wants To Be A Super Villain

We had been going over different plans to take over an evil empire for the past two days, living on nothing but takeout and Starbucks coffee (note to self: do not let 11 year old evil girl scouts have a triple Carmel maccacitos.)

Click here to find out more

Happy Thanksgiving

I'll be off to the Homeworld to have Thanksgiving dinner with the family and the in-laws. Happy Thanksgiving to you all.





(all three of you LOL)

Super-Villain: Looking for Housing

Happing Now on Who Wants To Be a Super-Villain
*****************************************************

Gabby thinks we should be out of the way on an Island. But Samantha worried about unruly lava flows and a lack of selling locations for cookies. I was worried about jedi fighting it out around the lair.


Run! Run from the Frosting slide


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Let Me Give You A Little Tip...

Special New Report from the Faux New Network.

The Faux News Network had recently heard rumors that Senator Padme Amidala hates poor people. While on a recent campaign trip to Tatooine, Senator Amidala stopped to eat a local diner and stiffed the waitress.


AT A DINER ON TATOOINE

Even though other networks are reporting that this is all misunderstandings, we here at Faux News have chose to ignore the fact and run with a little personal destruction.

During an interview with the waitress, Molly Nice, stated that she did not receive a tip from the Senator.


TAKING ORDERS, BUT NOT TIPS

When asked if she thought not getting a tip was proof that Senator Amidala was the greatest evil in the universe and a threat to everything we hold dear in the Republic, she replied, “No, I think she just forgot. She is a nice lady and I would vote for her.”

It is obvious that not getting a tip from Senator Amidala has crushed this poor woman soul and reason for living.


WORST PHOTOSHOP …. EVER

Local Representative to the Republic, Jawa Keysinitch, stated “This just show why we need universal health care. Did you just see that UFO? What we need to do is negotiate with Count Dooku and come to a peaceable solution. And furthermore my wife is hot!”

When reached for a comment Senator Amidala stated she had given a tip. “I told Miss Nice that her hairstyle had to go and gave her the name of my hairstylist. Duh, that the best tip of all.’


SHE DOES HAVE GREAT HAIR.

Faux New also contacted Master Yoda who responded by saying, “Nothing better you have to report? More important news, there isn’t? Balanced and Fair, is this? Why I watch the news not, is your fault.”

Tak's Caption Contest V 2.7

It is once again time for Tak's Caption Contest.

It is easy to play . Just put your funniest/lamest/profoundest caption on the picture.




I knew I could get around that writers strike!!

Who Want to be a Supervillain: Robbing a bank

Happing now on Who Wants To Be A Super-Villain

“Well OK then. Let get to the plan.” I say “Gabby, you and the gezzer patrol will set up in the park and do a civil war re-enactment show for the town folks. You be playing the part of the Connecticut 3rd Regiment Infantry….”

“Weren’t they out of New Haven?” Gabby asks “Is Star Hollow even near New Haven.”

“Ok, Gabby you guys can be the Connecticut 6th Regiment Infantry ….”

“But they were out of Hartford. Are we anywhere near Hartford?” Gabby asks again.
*********

Click here to read more

Strike that ...

It was a quiet day on patrol, so my squad decided to drop into the local Cantina to see if we could track down some rebel scum.

As we walked in to the place we see a Jedi, a Senator and a Wookie staring at us.


A LIZARD, A FUZZBALL AND COUSIN IT WALK IN TO A BAR …

“Tak, what are you doing?” whispers Master Yoda

“Uh, telling an amusing anecdote. Why are you interrupting me?” I ask

“So, the memo you did not get?” Yoda inquires


STOP, YOU MUST!

“No. No memo this morning. What did I forget to wash your speeder? I am sure I did that yesterday.” I reply

“Out the window, you must look. There, your future, will you see.” The green Jedi intones

I look out the window.


COULDN’T THEY HAVE WRITTEN BETTER SIGNS?

I look at Master Yoda with confusion.

“The writers have struck and so must you.” Yoda states.

“That doesn’t affect me. I am not a writer. Have you been reading the crap I put up here?” I start

Master Yoda looks at me, “Yes, crap it is. But better than most stuff on The CW. And get me started not on the fall line up on ABC. No, Stop you must. Re-runs and reality shows are all you can do. Go now.” He waves me out of the Cantina.

So here are some re-runs and a link to a reality show.

Tak’s Caption Contest

What I have learned being a Trooper

WHO WANT TO BE A SUPER-VILLAIN

More on crappy jobs

On one of the junk hole planets we liberated, I was assigned with two oath troopers the task of presenting the news on a planet wide board cast. Each trooper was assigned a “real” name to make the population connect better with us. I, TK 266 was called Terry, MD 598 was called Matthew and RT 111 was called Rudolf.


TK 266, Terry


RT 111, Rudolf


MD 598, Matthew

At the news station, a husband and wife team from Coruscant were told to figure out which of use would do the different jobs: Newscaster, Sports reporter and Weather Guy.

After banter it about for a while and testing all three of us out. The Wife decides that I should be the Sport reporter, Matthew should be the Newscaster and Rudolf should be the Weather Guy.

“Are you sure?” asked the husband.

“Not so much about the news caster and the sports reporter, but after that interview I am sure about the weather guy>” She replied

“The red one? Why?” Asked the Husband.

“Because” the wife beamed, “Rudolf the Red knows rain, dear."

Who Want to be a Supervillain: Looking for help

This week I have to get some henchmen:

Help Wanted: Looking for motivated and skilled associates for less then lawful enterprise. Duties may include all sort of bad things. Good waged, Health care and Dental for all. Please apply in person on Friday at Villain Park near the Koma Center.



Click here to read more

I blame Vanilla

I have been having all sort of weird dreams lately. Most involve strange thing happing on different world.

In the most recent dream I was lost on the ice world of Hoth, Stranded on a narrow stretch of land between the two large continents.

There was a vicious storm that limited visibility to only 3 meters.


BRRRR HOTH IS ICE COLD.

I woke up in a cold sweat and realized I was dreaming of a white isthmus.

WWBV - the game show

Happing now on ‘WHO WANT TO BE A VILLAIN”

The Henchman just keeps shaking his head.

I try to break the silence “So do I sing Ice Ice Baby now? I've been practicing my Running Man dance.” .....



Click here to find out more.

Be careful how you say things ...

One of the more mind numbing and annoying assignment a Trooper can get is guard duty at the Republic Senate building.

The problems with the assignment are two-fold: having to talk to people all day and having to deal with the Senator from all over the galaxy.

It is bad enough having the deal with Senator Ask Aak, but deal with the lot of them all at once can be damaging to ones psyche. Here are examples from a typical day.

*************

AOC: Good day Senator Balkie. Hope the transport in was not to bad.

Senator Balkie: No, it was fine *begins to walk through the detector*

AOC: Senator, you forgot to slide you ID card through the slot *turns off the alarm*

Senator Balkie: Ha Ha, I do that a lot, I am getting forgetful at my age. *begins to slide the card wrong*

AOC: Turn the card over … no not that way …. The magnetic strip has to face me ….No turn the strip down …. No, strip down facing me …..Ahhhhh my eyes … that is not what I meant!!!!!











Sen.Balkie in the buff

After washing my eyes with Hydrogen Peroxide for an hour I was back to work.

I see Senator Lairee K-Reg move over to my line.

AOC: Good day Senator K-Reg. How was the flight in from Induomodo?


Sen. K-Reg and his wide stance on the issues.

Senator K-Reg: It was just awful, with the exception of the stop over on Mimban. Great restrooms there.

AOC: Uhhh, Yeah.

Senator K-Reg: Did you know TK-266, that TK is a common middle name on Indumodo?

AOC: No, Sir I did not.

Senator K-Reg: Any chance you are part Imdumodoian?

AOC: No Sir, I don’t think so.

Senator K-Reg: Maybe you have a little Indumodoina in you? What do you think?

AOC: I do not believe so, sir.

Senator K-Reg: *leaning in close* would you like to have a little Indumdoian in you? *he winks*

AOC: *sighs* Senator, for the 37th time, no.

********************


I wish I was killing droids.

Don't Ask Aak, Don't Tell

Once again I have been assigned to Senator Ask Aak's detail. This assignment did not seem to be too bad. It turns out that the Senator is an avid, but lousy hunter. Every year he travels to different world with his hunting buddy to try and bag some big game.


MY FAVORITE BIG LAME HUNTER (Sen. Aak)

Senator Ask Aak informed me that he and his buddy will be hunting Krayt Dragons on Tattoine. They had a successful hunt on the planet several years ago. My job will be to pilot the two “hunters” around planet side.

We head out into the Dune Sea, traveling for several days. Senator Ask Aak finally tells me to set down in a barren valley that he remembers from his last trip.

I set up a base camp at the skiff, while the Senator and his buddy head off into the desert. I spend a peaceful two day on my own (only contemplating leaving the Senator to perish in the Dune Sea once or twice).


JUST FRACKING KRAYT

I get a com call to come pick-up the Senator. As I land at the site I see a massive Krayt Dragon and both men with big smiles.

We begin to load the dead beast on to the skiff, but I start to get worried about the weight of the beast.

“Senator, I don’t think we can take this thing out of here on the skiff. It is just too big.” I explain

The Senator’s buddy replies, "Look the pilot told us the same thing last time, but in the end we took out a Krayt bigger then this one."

All three of us argued for several minutes more. I finally gave up and agreed to fly everything out.We load up the Krayt and fire up the skiff.

The skiff shudders and strains trying to take off. It finally gets the off the ground. We are flying low and I try to pull the skiff higher to get out of the valley and crash into a large sand dune.

The three of us, dazed and confused, make there way out of the wreckage.

I look at the two of then and snap, "Where the heck are we?"

The Senator looks around, "About half a mile further than we got last time!"

Womp Rats, Jawas and Spies Oh My

I was on patrol on Tattoine, when I saw a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style Mud Hut:

Talking Womp Rat for Sale

I hop out of my rig, bang on the door and a Jawa appears and tells me the Womp Rat is in the back. I go into the back and see a ugly looking Womp Rat sitting there.


BUT CAN HE CONVERSE OR IS HE JUST A LIMBAUGH

"You talk?" I asks.

"Yep," the Womp Rat replies.

After I recover from the shock of hearing a Womp Rat talk, I ask "So, what's your story?"

The Womp Rat looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the Chancellor and he had me sworn into the toughest branch of the armed services ... The Grand Army of The Republic... You know one of their nicknames is "The Devil Rats."

In no time at all they had me jetting from planet to planet, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders; because no one figured a Womp Rat would be eavesdropping.

I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running, but the jetting around really tired me out and I knew I wasn't getting any younger.

So, I decided to settle down. I retired from the G.A.R (8 Womp Rat years is 56 G.A.R years) and signed up for a job at the spaceport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in."

"I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a litter of baby Womps, and now I'm just retired."

I was amazed. I go back in and ask the Jawa what he wants for the Womp Rat.

"Ten Credits," the Jawa says.

"Ten Credits? This Rat is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"

"Because he's a liar! He never did any of that crap. He was in the Republic Navy!"

Beer is good

I was in a Cantina on Coruscant. I walk up to the bar at the same moment that a Senator and a Jawa approached.

Simultaneously, all three of us ordered a beer. The bartender let out a little laugh and then pours three drafts.

As we get our beers, we all notice bugs floating in the foam.


It is doing the breast stroke?

The Senator wrinkles his nose, pushes his beer away and says “Bartender, what kind of establishment are you running. I am appalled.

I snort my displeasure at the Senator, flick the fly out of the beer, slam it down in one go and mutter “pansy”

Meanwhile the Jawa snatches up fly, begins to smack the fly on the back, while screaming “SPIT IT OUT! SPIT IT OUT”

51 Days Later ...

I was on leave and relaxing on Corellia. While me and several other Troopers were enjoying some Ale at a local tavern, when the door burst open in come four exuberant Corellian Marines.

They go to the bar and order five bottles of beer and ten glasses. After getting their order over, they sit down at a large table. The caps are popped, the glasses are filled and they begin toasting and chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"


GUESS THEY DON’T HAVE THAT WHOLE “NO FACIAL HAIR” RULE

Soon four more Marines arrive, take up their drinks and the chanting grows, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"

Finally the last two Marine comes in, one with a picture under his arm. He walks over to the table, and sets the picture in the middle and the table erupts.

Up jump the others, they begin dancing around the table, exchanging high-fives, all the while chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"

I can't contain my curiosity any longer, so I walks over to the table. There in the center is a beautifully framed child's puzzle. The frenzy dies down as I approach and ask asks one of the Marines, "What’s all the chanting and celebration about?"

The Marine who brought in the picture pipes in, "Everyone thinks that the Corellian Marines are dumb and they make fun of us. So, we decided to set the record straight. Ten of us got together, bought this puzzle and put it together. The side of the box said 2-4 years, but we put it together in 51 days."


MAN, THESE GUYS ARE LAMER THAN I THOUGHT.

The Ooteeni Tour

Senator Ask Aak was on a goodwill tour of the Outer Rim and stopped on Tattoine. As Usual I am performing security duty for the Senator.


SENATOR ASK AAK – GIVING GOODWILL

Our first stop was a Bantha farm run by Jawas. The Senator was a little surprised to hear that Jawas were into ranching, being that Jawas are know for being scrape dealers. I informed him that Jawas are involved in many economic pursuits and before he asked clued him in that not all Jawas were Dray.


FARMING AND NOT DRAY

Once some of the Jawas had gathered around, Senator Ask Aak began his goodwill speech.

“My Friends, I stand here today to bring you greeting from the Republic. We want to expand the goodness of the Republic to worlds like yours, so as to enrich all of our lives.”

The Jawas erupt into cheers of “Ooteeni, Ooteeni!!”

The Senator continues, pleased by the cheers “Working together we can bring forth peace and prosperity to the Galaxy …”

More cheers “Ooteeni, Ooteeni, Ooteeni, Ooteeni!”

“And you my little droid loving friends will be at the forefront of our thought as we more towards this Glorious future!” Senator Ask Aak thunders on

“Ooteeni, Ooteeni, Ooteeni, Ooteeni, Ooteeni, Ooteeni, Ooteeni, Ooteeni” the Jaws thunder back.


TAKING THE BANTHA TOUR

After the speech we tehn take a tour of the Bantha Ranch. As we wander through one of the sand “pastures” I warn the Senator “Watch out that you don’t step in any of the Ooteeni or you’ll never get that smell of your shoes.”

Wookie Droppings

I was stationed on the Wookie home world of Kashyyyk. The place is a jungle and the Wookie live in grass and wood home built high in the trees.


WATCH OUT FOR WOOKIE DROPPINGS

In the area I was patrolling there were several Wookie clans that have been fighting each other. One of their customs when they beat another tribe was to take the most prized possession of the enemy's chief.

After a particularly fierce fight a rich clan was defeated. The cheif of the defeated clan had a prized solid gold throne.


LOOKS MORE LIKE AN EWOK THROWN

The winning clan took the throne, and put it in the loft in their chief’s house. Unfortunately, the throne was much too heavy to be kept in a home build of grass and wood, and it fell right through the platform, falling 250 feet onto the chief, killing him instantly.

My squad was called into the Wookie’s village to check out the problem and make an assessment.


MAKING MY REPORT

After reviewing all the facts I called my commander and told him the bottom line was people who live in Grass Houses shouldn't stow thrones

I Missed This Night At The Bar

An Abyssin walked in to a cantina, ordered an Ol’ Mos Elsey beer. After drinking it down in one gulp, He turns to the crowd and says “I’m the toughest SOB you loser will ever see. You have better watch out or you may just lose you life.”


HE HAS ALL THE MAKINGS OF AN ASS IN HIS NAME.

The rest of the Cantina stares for a moment, then goes back to their drinking.

The Abyssin walks over to a Bith and shouts “Who’s the toughest guy in this stinkin’ joint!!”

Terrified the Bith stutter “You are, mighty warrior.”


HAD THE BITH SCARED OUT OF HIM.

Next the Abyssin grabs a Rodin by the collar and barks “Who is the toughest guy in the rat hole of a bar!”

The Rodin, shaking in his boots whimpers, “Oh Sir, you are the toughest being here.”


FEELING A LITTLE BLUE AFTER HIS ENCOUNTER WITH THE BULLY

Finally the Abyssin swaggers over to a wookie and bellow “Who is the toughest Mo-Fo in the junky little cantina!’

Fast as lightning, the Wookie snatches up the Abyssin by his legs, slams him against a table half a dozen times leaving the Abyssin feeling like he’d been run over by a space freighter. The Wookie then stomps on the Abyssin till it looks like a tortilla, finishes his drink and ambles away.


ALL HE WANTED WAS A DRINK AND A FLEA BATH

The Abyssin lets out a moan of pain, lifts his head weakly and hollers after the Wookie - "Just because you don't know the answer, you don't have to get so upset about it!"

I Wish I Had A Mai Tai

I was on patrol riding a Bantha through miles of the sun-drenched desert searching for some sign of life, due to the fact I was a little lost.


WHERE DID THESE GUYS GO?

My supplies were running low when the Bantha died. Now on foot, I desperately sought refuge from the heat, and, most importantly, a source for water.

Suddenly, I came across a Jawa vendor in the middle of the desert.


CHECK OUT MY SALE RACK

"Thank the force I found you!" I cried. "Please help me. I'm in dire need of some water."

"Well," said the Jawa, "I don't have any water. But would you like to buy one of these fine ties."

"What am I going to do with a tie?" I asked.

"That's what I'm selling sir. If you don't like it, I can't help you."

I left the Jawa and walked on for many more miles, hoping each minute that he would find refuge from the scorching sun.

Suddenly I spotted a Jawa restaurant in the distance.

Unable to comprehend a restaurant located in the middle of the desert, I assumed the place was a mirage, but decided to check it out anyway. A

As I approached the door, I was amazed to see the place actually existed.


WHO WOULD OPEN A RESTAURANT OUT HERE

The Jawa doorman stopped me before I entered.


DANG IT! A BOUNCER!

"Excuse me sir," the Jawa said, "But you can't come in here without a tie!"

"Riding" Betty

I had been station with a small unit on the dessert world of Tattoine. For 30 miles in any direction was nothing but sand and hot and more sand. As were we in the middle of the “Sandstorm” season, most of our vehicles were out of commission.

After about a month, we were assigned a new Republic Officer. He was some poor junior grade who must have pissed off someone up the chain of command to get this assignment.

It was my job to show him around and answer his questions.

“So Trooper,” the Officer inquired, “How do you do patrols without vehicles? You can’t go far on foot?”

“We have been given a group of Banthas, Sir” I see his confusion; someone didn’t do his home work. “A native animal of large size, which is accustomed to the heat and used by the locals as a primary mode of transportation.”


HEARD OF BANTHA? NO. YOU DID NOT DO YOUR HOMEWORK AS WELL I SEE.

The Officer nods and we continue the tour of the outpost. Towards the end I see the Officer is trying to work up the nerve to ask a question.

“Ummm, Trooper. What about …..errrr…. well …. Companionship?” the officer asks with hesitation.

“You mean sex, sir?” I reply

He turns a little red and nods his head.

“The Troopers have to take matter in to their own hands, so to speak. But the officer can use Betty.” I explain

“Oh, I see the base has a concubine. Very good.” The Officer smiles.

I laugh “No, Sir. Betty is one of the Banthas.”

“What?!?!?! …. That’s …. What?. Your dismissed trooper” The officer barks at me, turns and storms off to the officer quarters.

At the end of the officer's first week I am on late night guard duty, when I see the young officer walking across the compound carrying a ladder. He heads into the stable and come out 20 minutes later.

“Trooper,” he hails “You know what, that Betty is not half bad. It took a while to figure out how to … well you know, but that is what the ladder was for. I think I might have another go next week.” He gives me a thumbs up.

I look at him askance and say “What you like to do is up to you Sir, but most of the other officers ride Betty into town, go to the cantina and hit on the locals.”

Not that there is anything wrong with that ...

Once again I am performing guard duty at press conference, but not for Senator Ask Aak. Thank goodness for small favor! Apparently the ambassador from Naboo, Sio Bibble, is speaking about some kind of recent problem. I am hoping it is something cool like a new trade war on Naboo.

************************************************************************

Sio Bibble: I am glad you have all come here today so we can clear up some misconceptions about recent events …..


Coming Clean?

Reporter 1: You mean about you getting arrested and fined for hanging out in Men’s rooms at the Coruscant Space terminal?

Reporter 2: Yeah, because that is what we want to talk about! Is it true that you were attempting something torrid with the attending service droid?

Sio Bibble (turning a red): That is untrue! It just when drying my hands I happen to have a wide stance. I may have bumped the service droid with my foot.


Funny, he doesn’t look Dray

Reporter 1: But the report I read said you weren’t wearing any pants. What do you have to day about that?

Sio Bibble: Oh that. Well, when I bumped the service droid, it spilled soap all over my robes and I took them off to clean them in the sink. Simple enough. But back to my main point, I did nothing wrong.

Reporter 3: What about the rumors that you are Dray?

Sio Bibble (looking furtive): I am afraid I don’t know what Dray means. I am just a simple Ambassador from a small system. I don’t know the strange ways and words of Coruscant.

Reporter 3: Dray is someone who has an unnatural attraction to droids. And I find it hard to beleive that you don’t know what Dray means. You spend a lot of time, as Ambassador, traveling to various worlds. In fact you have travled to Coruscant at least 48 time in the last several years, with almost every visit coinciding with a with a visit to Droid factories.

Sio Bibble: Well….. ummmm….. errrr… I can explain that …..

Reporter 1: And what about this news report from 25 years ago, linking you to a Spice and Dray ring in the Naboo Senate.


OK, he looks a little Dray

Sio Bibble: Hey, No fair! No charges were ever brought. I was cleared of everything. The droids involved had their memories wiped …. I mean I never did anything wrong.

Reporter 2: What about reports that you have caught asking droids, and I quote, “Hey goldenrod, do you need a good polishing?”

Sio Bibble: Oh so now I am on trial for wanted to make sure droids are clean? Let me just say without any reservation that I am not Dray! I have never been Dray. I have been opposed to the Dray movement and will not speak any further on the subject!!!

Bibble storms off the stage as the reporter’s high-five each other over their good luck on a slow news day.

I am not the Paparizzi

Recently I heard a rumor that after Death or rejoining the force or whatever you want to call it, some powerful Jedi can materialize. It apparently is a way for them to pass their wisdom on to other, even after death.

I had a little bit of leave coming to me and decided to act as a “ghost” hunter. I would find places strong with the force and snap a few photos.

I found a place deep on a forest moon and was able to find not one, but three ethereal Jedi. Not only were they ok with me trying to take their picture, but they even posed for me. I took 4 pictures before they disappeared. The jungle was dark and I hoped my flash bulbs worked well.

Back home, I swung by the Jedi Temple to use their dark room and show the Jedi what I had done. General Kenobi and Master Skywalker were with me when I developed the photos.









I looked at the two Jedi “but honest, I had pictures of ghost Jedi, they even posed for me!”

General Kenobi patted me on the shoulder to comfort me and said “It looked like the spirit was willing, but the flash was weak."

TAGGED

Novy, (LINK) tagged me for this Meme....And the first thing you have to do is post the rules of it before you do anything else...So, here they are:

1. You have to post these rules before you give the facts.

2. You must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.

3. At the end of your blog post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.


I don’t have a middle name, so I will go with TAK (short for TK 266)

T: Talkative. I am the chattiest clone you will ever meet. I am know as the chatty clone, the talkative trooper, the gossiping gunner, the communicative clone, the multiloquent military man, the gregarious guard …. You get the point.

A: Amusing. Some people find me and my writing amusing.

K: Killer. I have been know to mangle, murder and otherwise do damage to the English language. Some of my misspelling have been so horrendous, that English major have been know to fling themselves of high building in the hopes of crushing me with their bodies and stop me be for I kill some poor word.

I tag:

Henchy
JJ
And
DJK

Lives Hang In The Balance Sheet.

I stopped by my favorite Cantina on Tattoine, when I noticed JJ the Jawa sitting alone and drinking.


JJ LOOKING SAD. (I think)

I approached him and notice he looked down. "You look terrible. What's the problem?"

"My Uncle died three months ago," JJ said, "and left me $25,000."

"Gee, that's tough," I replied.

"Then two months ago," JJ continued, "My grandfather died, leaving me $90,000."

"Wow. Two male relatives gone in two months. No wonder you're depressed." I said, in commiseration.

"And last month my aunt died, and left me $15,000." JJ continued

"Three close family members lost in three months? I can see why you are sad." I replied

"Then this month," continued JJ, "absolutely nothing! So I am drinking to mourn the loss of income"



Jawas!!!