Senator Aak Ask has called another press conference to an important “revelation”
SENATOR AAK ASK
Senator Aak Ask: I have called you all here today to address some of the rumors that have been swirling around the media. I want to let you all know the truth of the situations.
Reporter 1: What rumors? And why the truth now? *giggling form the press core*
Senator Aak Ask: You know you vultures have been circling, trying to find out about my affair with my campaign manager’s wife. I am here to admit that the rumors are true, but I only did it because I abuse Spice.
*mummers of confusion from the press* Reporter 2: Sir, didn’t that just happen to Javin Gnusun of Sa Fra’ soico? Are you just doing this as some kind of stunt?
Senator Aak Ask: No, Never. I had to get this off my chest and get into rehab. Maybe the Fetty Bord center on Alderaan?
Reporter 3: Senator, You don’t have a campaign manger, according to my records.
Reporter 2: Isn’t that the rehab center that Lisney Low Han is currently attending?
Senator Aak Ask: Uhhh, I meant I had a Spice induced rage that caused me to fight with the Coruscant Security Force. I told them I thought that the Wookies were the cause of all the wars in the Galaxy and called an officer Sugar thighs. I am a sick man, in need to goring to the Fetty Bord rehab center.
Reporter 1: That wasn’t you. That was Krell Gebbsun, the director of “The Passion of The Force”
Senator Aak Ask: *becoming agitated* “How about I wrote inappropriate Comm messages to youngling at the temple? Or I may have had an affair with this clone trooper and made him give me Spice!”
The reporters all turn to me and I shake my head ‘No’. The reporters start packing up and leaving.
Senator Aak Ask is still ranting “No, No don’t leave. You al have to report on my Spice addiction and my need to get into that rehab center. They only take famous people who get time on the Holo-net. Come on people! How else am I supposed to get to meet Ms. Low Han?"
Once again I am reminded of why I prefer battle duty.