Friday, July 27, 2007

I have had too much time to think

Since I had a lot of time over the very long deployment I had tome to think about some of the things that bother me. So with out further ado, here is a list of 10 things the bug me about being a Stormtrooper.

10. Blast doors don’t always open all the way.

9. Sometimes I feel like just another number.

8. The brainiac who thought of white amour should try suiting up and hiding in a forest himself sometime!

7. The pension plan stinks -- if you live that long.

6. Can’t see a thing in that helmet.

5. Vindictive captain always puts me on dangerous detail.

4. “Armor forms an anti-blaster cocoon,” my ass!

3. Cheap-ass rifles are way off calibration. I keep missing my targets.

2. Every time I meet a nice girl, she shoots at me.

1. I personally toasted several rebels on the Tantive IV, and I still got less recognition than that guy who just said, “Look, sir, droids!”

Totally ripped off from the Holonet :


Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Oh so it's the calibration of the rifles. Well it all makes sense now.

Kid Flash said...

10. Then blast the damn door every time it doesn't open all the way. Then the "high power" will know where they should put the money.

9. You feel like just a number? Always thought you'd feel like a clone, either way if you do feel like a number I hope it's number 3. Because 3 is the magic number.

8. Well when you think about it, if more of you die then they're bound to make new armours for all of you. So remember, if you die, your dying for the team and the armour.

7. It stinks because they know most of you guys will die before you get it. The first pension was introduced in Germany by the Kaiser for people at the age of 62, because the average German's life was 61.

6. You should get a mask. A spandex mask, a multi-coloured spandex mask. Because they are so cool.

5. Kill the Captain. Aren't you guys made to kill.

4. See, that armour has made you lazy. Did you know that in WW1 many soldiers assumed because they had steel helmets they could survive sniper bullets. Thouh they never did find out if they could or couldn't often because they died, because of the sniper bullet. So next time you go out there, always remember the armour is not with you.

3. Well then you should delibrately try to miss your target, therefore you'll hit the target. I think...

2. Well then she's not a nice girl, shoot back.

1. Maybe nobody likes you? I mean, I like you AOC. But, maybe you should do something about your armour. Polish it up a bit, make that blaster of your have bit more extra "boom" and "flash", you know. Make yourself STAND out. Make yourself a hot mama.

Darth Nepharia said...

Tak, if shooting at you works to get your attention, I'll do it. Look me up some time....

Sure missed you. Hope your deployment was tolerable.


Skywalker said...

No respect, huh?

Dark Jedi Kriss said...

I dont shoot at you! Ok, I popped your head a few times but I never shot ya.

You want me too? *wink*

jin said...


That's why I've never shot at you.
I'm not a nice girl.

Lauphen Staar said...

LMAO!! I love it!

Spider-man said...

I thought I was the only one who had a mask that virtually impairs eyesight! Nice to know there's a whole group of us!