A news Update from CGN (the Clone Gossip Network)
Alderaan - Pandme Spears is saying bye-bye to A-Fed.
The pop princess, Pandme Spears, filed for divorce Tuesday from her husband, former backup dancer and aspiring rapper from Tatooine, Anakin Federline.
The Alderaan Superior Court filing cited "irreconcilable differences and the boy can’t sing."
Spears, 28, married Federline, 20, two years ago in a quite (secrete) ceremony on the Moon of Deagobah. Spears is suspected of being pregnant with twins or she has just gone off her diet.
Spears' attorney, Nobail Organa, stated “Ms. Spears was tired of living with a no talent, whiny, momma’s boy.”
Her marriage provided endless fodder for tabloids, which speculated frequently that the union was in trouble.
Federline's attorney, JJ the Jawa, issued the following statement. “While Mr. A-Fed has been out making the Republic safe for white rapper everywhere, his wife has done nothing but mock his career. I have known this boy from his day back in the trailer parks of Tatooine. He is good people. All he wants from this separation, and it is Ms. Spears who is being the Separatist here, is fair compensation for his sacrifices in the marriage. Oh and he wants her to pay for a vacation to Mustafar”
When asked if he was even a real lawyer, JJ yell “look Pamala Glanderson” and ran away.
In an interview with The Associated Press two weeks ago, Federline had nothing but praise for Spears.
"Her influence on me has been really big," he said. "She's a strong woman and she knows what she wants out of life and that helps build a strong man. I look up to you, baby."
In the divorce papers, which do not mention a prenuptial agreement, Spears asks for custody of the couple's droids, with visitation rights for A-Fed.